To be Disciplined

As I have been reading everyones hopes and resolutions for 2016, I have been asking the Lord to show me what He wants me to focus on this year.

I don't really do resolutions. For me, resolutions have always been something that I started January 1st and by the middle of January, I failed.

I don't want a resolution. I want a focus.

So, as I prayed, and thought, and thought, and prayed a little more, it came to me.

Discipline.

It is something I have truly lacked in my life, despite my deisre to be a disciplined person. Hence, my resolutions always failing, ha ha.

I have always admired when others were able to really stick to their goals, sometimes, seemingly wtihout it even being hard for them. (Though, I know that is likely not true.)

I have great ideas. Purposes for doing things. I am a fantastic list maker. I can look around my house and tell you exactly what needs to be done and how to do it. This quote really says how I feel.

I have the dream....just not the discipline.

First and foremost, I want to be disciplined in not only my household "duties" but in my spiritual walk with God. With my kids. With homeschooling. With exercising. With loving people around me. With following through on what I know needs to get done.

Funny story: Last week, I was praying for my two oldest girls at their bedtime. I prayed something about helping us to be more disciplined. The next night, as I was driving Keira, my  seven (and-a-half) year old home from dance class, she says, "Mom, why did you pray last night that we would be punished?" It took me a minute to figure out what she meant and then I just laughed out loud.  It was a bit hard to explain.

But, isnt' it so true that discipline is really what keeps us from needing "punishment"? Even as adults. I truly don't believe that God punishes us. I definitely feel that anything bad in our life comes from Satan himself, but we do get "punished" by our own consequences when we are not disciplined in certain areas of our life.

Discpline....so important.

I can't fail at this by mid January because this is a focus. It's not a diet. It's not a program. I hope for it to be the focus of my life this year and the rest of my life!

What's your "thing" this year?

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By Your Side...Even When We Fail.

This was a rough week for so many reasons. I won't go into any details but as you can imagine, life with 4 little ones, a husband who has a new job and can never take time off, not too many breaks....and because I am human, with human husband and four little human children! I definitely failed this week on so many levels. 

But this song just kept me going. It seemed to come on the radio every time I needed to hear it....and it got stuck in my head. So, I thought I'd share. 

I love the way that I can imagine Jesus talking to me. Lifting up my face. Reminding me that I cannot run or hide. He is enough. I need to stop fighting His hands that are holding me and when I do. Oh how life improves! 

By Your Side--Tenth Avenue North

Why are you striving these days

Why are you trying to earn grace
Why are you crying
Let me lift up your face
Just don't turn away 

Why are you looking for love
Why are you still searching
As if I'm not enough
To where will you go child
Tell me where will you run
To where will you run

'Cause I'll be by your side wherever you fall
In the dead of night whenever you call
And please don't fight these hands that are holding you
My hands are holding you

Look at these hands at my side
They swallowed the grave on that night
When I drank the world's sin
So I could carry you in
And give you life 
I want to give you life

And I'll be by your side wherever you fall
In the dead of night whenever you call
And please don't fight these hands that are holding you
My hands are holding you

Here at my side wherever you fall
In the dead of night whenever you call
And please don't fight these hands that are holding you
My hands are holding you 

'Cause I, I love you
I want you to know
That I, yeah I'll love you
I'll never let you go, no, no

And I'll be by your side wherever you fall
In the dead of night whenever you call
And please don't fight these hands that are holding you
My hands are holding you

Here at my side wherever you fall
In the dead of night whenever you call
And please don't fight these hands that are holding you
My hands are holding you 
Here at my side, my hands are holding you
Ohhh...





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